Monday, December 26, 2011

MY LOVE FOR CHRISTMAS AND ITS MAGIC - WHERE IT BEGAN.

First I need to give a little back story bout my self I suppose.  I grew up with 2 wonderful grandmas - Mamaw and Granny.  You could not have asked for more loving women or more fun.  They also loved Christmas and everything about it.  My mamaw loved to decorate everything for Christmas and I mean everything - the yard, the toilet, the floor, and everything in between.  If there was a Christmas thing that sang or was animated it was at my Mamaw's house and she would decorate as soon as she could and leave it up as long as she could.  MY Granny did not decorate like that but she did love the Holiday.  She use to watch the Christmas movies with me and my sister especially the Grinch - she knew all the words to the song!

Also they loved giving.  I mean we had pretty good size families on both sides and well these women never forgot anyone ever and if by chance they did - they grabbed a card and stuffed some money in it.  They gave me my love for the Holidays and convinced me how great and special this time really is thus giving me the belief that Christmas time is magical.  

Now I know some of you may think "Aren't you alittle old to think that?"  Well, see that is the beauty to me of Christmas magic - you can believe in it no matter your age just think "Yes, Virginia there is a Santa Claus!"  (I loved the story growing up and got a kick out of the fact that the little girl's name is Virginia where I was born.)  

Now I would be lying if I said every Holiday has been magical to me in fact one year I discovered I was pregnant only to announce it to family and then miscarry a few months after Christmas.  Trust me that was a hard time for me the next year since I lost my Granny after that in March.  I still tear up at the thought of that month -  I lost the baby I was carrying, my Granny and her mother, my son's dog died and my husband at the time said he wanted a divorce.  I often wonder how I survived that month and then I realize by the grace of God and my Granny who was in Heaven watching over me and of course my son who is and will always be my Sanity.  

I still remember the first Christmas after my Granny died, there was a huge void in the family.  A void that will never be replaced.  I often wonder if my Granny realized how much she meant to all of us when she was alive.  She was our glue as was her mother who died while we were at my Granny's funeral.  I remember thinking that we all needed to step up for the sake of the family to try to become what she was - the Glue!  I wish I could say we have done it but overall I know we have tried and at times the glue is unbreakable.  And yes that first year it was hard to believe in Christmas magic but my other family members showed it to me.  I think we all showed it to each other actually especially the kids.  I only had my son then but he reminded me that it was now my job to carry on the tradition.  

A few years later I was given one of my favorite Christmas gifts ever - my oldest daughter.  She was born a week before Christmas  and thus Christmas magic cause she had been a high risk pregnancy and the labor was not easy but she came out of it like a champ - which is partly why she will always be my Strength. I got to celebrate that Christmas with an amazing little girl who will never know what she did for me but I will always be thankful.  

Almost two years later came my final blessing - my youngest daughter. Now my Mamaw died a few years ago and every Christmas is hard cause I used to imagine that Mrs. Claus would be like my Mamaw full of warmth and kindness and a love for everything Christmasy.  Every year is hard at the Holiday season but members of my family try to rise up and fill the shoes although we all know that will never be done.  I mean my mom always helps my sis and me with Christmas dinner on my dad's side every year.  Plus she always makes it special for our kids.  My Aunt Sue who is just like my Mamaw in kindness and warmth gets every kid something even though she is not rich or anything.  She even still gets my sis and me and the rest of us something too.  My Aunt Joyce cooks the dinner so that we all still have the memories for the next generation.

So every year I get excited in Christmas and the magic it brings and I love this Holiday.  I figure one day my kids will carry on the tradition of Christmas magic to their kids and who knows maybe they will all sit and read this post at Christmas time.  Of course now I know the real reason for this Holiday is Jesus's birth and I know that this is truly why the time is magical.   

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